100 Characteristics of Big Girls

As a new grandmother, I have been deeply pondering just what I desire to help instill in my posterity. I see it as such a high and holy calling to have the privilege of praying for my grandchild's life and future.

As I have pondered specific things to pray for her, I have made a list.

On my list is that I and her mommie and all other women who will be influential in her life would demonstrate what it means to be a big girl.

So...for myself, I have made a list of 100 "Big Girl Characteristics"; things I want to be very conscious about demonstrating before her little eyes.

May you, my sweet darling child be so privileged as to live among big girls whom you can emulate.

I love you! And my prayers for you will never cease!

100 Big Girl Characteristics

1.Big girls show kindness to all people; even extraordinary kindness to those who have been unkind to her or those that she loves.

2. Big girls are unassuming, never assigning feelings or motives to others that are mere speculation.

3. Big girls have little concern over being overlooked because they aren't living to be looked at!

4. Big girls practice self control.

5. Big girls don't slander.

6. Big girls don't gossip.

7. Big girls don't listen to gossip or slander and don't believe everything they hear.

8. Big girls aren't mean.

9. Big girls are not known as people who are hard or impossible to please.

10. Big girls don't think that somebody must be blamed for every problem.

11. Big girls know that if they want to be respected as a lady, they are going to have to act like a lady.

12. Big girls are not manipulators.

13. Big girls do not allow themselves to be used or manipulated. Without being unkind, they simply back away.

14. Big girls are not demanding, expecting people to jump at their every wish or request. They do not portray the attitude that they are the only one with a need.

15. Big girls go the extra mile.

16. Big girls know that nothing in the world came to us for free. If we have it, SOMEBODY worked for it.

17. Big girls say, "Thank you"!

18. Big girls leave a place better than they found it and people feeling better about themselves after having been in their presence.

19. Big girls still say "Yes, Ma'am" and "Yes Sir" to their Mama and Daddy.

20. Big girls never, ever, ever show disrespect to their parents or elders.

21. Big girls make their parents feel important, value their words, seek their advice, and recognize their contributions to themselves and others and ABSOLUTELY NEVER make them feel small in their own eyes or in others eyes.

22. Big girls take good care of all that has been entrusted to them.

23. Big girls try not to be a burden to others, but can humbly and gratefully accept help on occasions when it is needed.

24. Big girls know when and how to zip their lip; that if there is any question as to whether or not to speak, DON'T!

25. Big girls look for the good in others.

26. Big girls are modest and don't flaunt themselves.

27. Big girls prepare for the future and for their children's future.

28. Big girls are real and genuine.

29. Big girls ask questions and get their facts straight and don't mouth off about things they don't understand.

30. Big girls don't seek to look good by bragging on themselves nor by putting others down.

31. Big girls can be trusted with a secret.

32. Big girls do their good deeds privately if at all possible, never seeking recognition and accolades.

33. Big girls have the grace to overlook wrongs or insensitive actions, realizing that we're all just flawed human beings, including herself.

34. Big girls never make a public display of others shortcomings.

35. Big girls make room for others to be different than her and don't assume that differences make others wrong but rather make life more interesting.

36. Big girls cover flaws in others rather than exposing them.

37. Big girls protect whom and what they love; but they leave defending whom and what they love to God.

38. Big girls know how to be firm without being mean.

39. Big girls can laugh at themselves.

40. Big girls know their limits and do not carry guilt when they need to say, "No."

41. Big girls desire another's happiness and success even at the expense of some of their own.

42. Big girls live in the knowledge that they may not (and probably don't) know what it's like to live in another's skin and therefore give them every benefit of the doubt.

43. Big girls Never expect the world to be responsible for their messes or their happiness.

44. Big girls do not create drama or pull others into their problems.

45. Big girls talk to God about people, not to people about people.

46. Big girls live with the ever present knowledge that it is God's way to cause life to be doled out to us in the same way that we have doled it out to others and therefore they treat everyone as they want to be treated.

47. Big girls accept an apology graciously and gratefully, making it easy for others to apologize when necessary, remembering that the time will surely come when it is THEY who will have the difficult and humbling task of asking forgiveness.

48. Big girls don't make excuses.

49. Big girls are not lazy. They work hard.

50. Big girls know how to wait patiently.

51. Big girls think before they act or speak.

52. Big girls have goals.

53. Big girls Control their tongues!

54. Big girls don't whine and complain.

55. Big girls are not insensitive of others time by talking incessantly.

56. Big girls are honest and worthy of trust; beginning with being honest with themselves before God.

57. Big girls are more preoccupied with how "I" can improve than how someone else should improve.

58. Big girls aren't overly sensitive.

59. Big girls aren't easily offended.

60. Big girls are generous with compliments and encouraging words.

61. Big girls know how to share.

62. Big girls give credit where and when credit is due.

63. Big girls know when enough is enough and where to draw a line in the sand. They do not give away their dignity at the altar of abuse.

64. Big girls are not quitters.

65. Big girls do not "suck up" to people that they think they can gain some notoriety from. They treat all people the same.

66. Big girls value truth more than they value being popular. They don't fall for the lie that to teach truth is not loving.

67. Big girls look first and foremost to themselves when conflict arises and seek to know how they themselves can improve through the conflict.

69.Big girls are never too big or too old to seek advice and counsel from their Mama's or other older women.

70. Big girls cherish relationships and take more thought to what they can give than what they can get.

71. Big girls care more about others than about themselves.

72. Big girls seek God's agenda for their lives.

73. Big girls keep their priorities in order.

74. Big girls take responsibility seriously and are dependable.

75. Big girls listen well, both with their ears and with their eyes.

76. Big girls genuinely rejoice when others are praised or recognized.

77. Big girls are not jealous because another's happiness means every bit as much to them as their own.

78. Big girls are deeply appreciative of every kind thing another may do for them and gratitude is a defining characteristic of her life.

79. Big girls do not think that everything in life is about competition or about them.

80. Big girls know how to have fun responsibly.

81. Big girls have healthy self esteem because they know that people do not define them; God does.

82. Big girls are open and appreciative of constructive criticism when it is being offered from a heart that loves them and wants good things for them.

83. Big girls take a solid, unashamed stand for truth in the most loving way possible.

84. Big girls make wise choices, one day at a time.

85. Big girls don't use sarcasm or innuendos. They don't talk down at people.

86. Big girls are not perfect but they know how to say, "I'm sorry", and "I was wrong" and mean it.

87. Big girls are sensitive to the feelings of others.

88. Big girls would rather be known for their wisdom than for their position or social status.

89. Big girls do not solicit pity or indulge in self pity.

90. Big girls are courageous.

91. Big girls are confident.

92. Big girls need no ones approval but God's.

93. Big girls keep their promises.

94. Big girls allow their husbands to wear the britches.

95. Big girls are not bossy.

96. Big girls do not feel the need to avenge themselves but leave that responsibility to God.

97. Big girls never, ever, ever think they have reached a place of superiority in any area! They are always learning and improving.

98. Big girls are very much involved in the world while remaining distinctly separate.

99. Big girls do not have the "Superwoman Syndrome." They know how and when to rest.

100. Big girls know that it is impossible to truly be a big girl without the Spirit of the living God controlling their lives daily.

ARE WORLD EVENTS ADDING UP TO THE SUMMING UP OF ALL THINGS? PART 1

Are World Events Adding Up to the Summing Up of All Things? Part 1

August 6, 2009 at 5:02pm

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Are World Events Adding Up to the Summing Up of All Things?
Part I
As many of my FB friends know all too well, I have recently finished teaching an in-depth study of the book of Revelation. As you read my almost weekly status updates, perhaps you would have agreed with my daughter when she said, “Mom, you’re kinda freaking out, aren’t you?” Well, let me tell you! I think that is a fairly accurate statement! Although I have studied this book in the past, this time became very, very different. As I taught from week to week, I also watched before my very eyes as world events eerily seemed to be shaping up for these very events to take place. I began to feel a sense of urgency that I have never before felt in my life; a burden to snatch as many as possible, through whatever means possible, from the terrible time of Tribulation that Jesus prophesied would come upon this earth. A time “such as has not occurred since the beginning of the world until now, nor ever shall.” (Matt. 24:21) I would not wish these events on my worst enemy, much less any of you, my beloved friends!
While I do not consider myself in any way to be a Bible Scholar, I do believe that God is able to reveal truth to even me because I desire desperately to know it and am willing to obey what is revealed to me, whatever the cost. (John 7:17) I will try to be as brief as possible as I share with you my conclusions as they relate to current events. I will leave to you the responsibility of studying the Scriptures on your own to see if my conclusions are your own as well. IF mine are accurate, we are on a fast track toward the summing up of all things; the fulfillment of God’s eternal plan for the earth and it’s inhabitants.
So....that being said, please hang with me as I build on a few foundational truth’s necessary for an understanding of the book of Revelation.
1. God revealed to Daniel that there were 490 years decreed to complete His plan for the Jewish people. (Daniel 9:24-27)
2. 483 of those years have been fulfilled precisely, to the day, as God told Daniel they would be.(Daniel 9:25-26a describe those years) If you know the history of the nation of Israel, you will find this utterly astounding!!!
3. There are 7 years still pending for God to complete His plan for the nation of Israel. These 7 years are referred to as the “Tribulation,” the “Great Tribulation,” the “time of Jacob’s (Israel’s) trouble,” and the “Day of the Lord.” (Matt. 24:9,21; Jer. 30:7; II Thes. 2:2) This time of Tribulation will occur at the “end of time” as we know it.
4. Rev. 5-20:3 is a detailed account of these 7 years of Tribulation, which God will precisely perform, even as He has the 483 yrs.
5. At some point, before these 7 years begin, believers in Christ will be “snatched up” in what is widely known as the rapture of the church. (I Thes. 4:13-17; I Cor. 15:51-53)
Many do not understand that the rapture (being “caught up”) and the Second Coming of Christ to earth are two separate events. In the rapture, believers are “caught up” to be with the Lord. (Note Scriptures above) In the Second Coming, Christ, along with all previously raptured saints will return TO THE EARTH to set up His eternal kingdom on earth!! The prayer that you and I have prayed all our lives, “Thy kingdom COME, Thy will be done ON EARTH as it is in heaven” will finally be answered at His second coming! There are some who believe that these two events happen simultaneously. I tend to disagree with this view because of the previously noted Scriptures. Either way, HE IS COMING AGAIN TO THIS EARTH. We will either be here for the 7 years of Tribulation or we won’t. My study has led me to believe that we won’t. (The “we” I am speaking of are genuine believers whose lives have been transformed by Jesus Christ) ALL OTHERS WILL BE HERE! The purpose of this 7 yrs., as I stated before, is to fulfill God’s plan for the Jew’s.
A little added addendum may of interest to you here. The Old Testament has over 300 SPECIFIC prophecies (meaning easily understood, no interpretation necessary) of the first coming of Christ. (His virgin birth, His birthplace, Bethlehem, etc.) NOW.......chew on this for a moment if you will. Statisticians agree that the chance of ONLY 8 of those 300 being fulfilled in one person is 1 chance in 10 to the 17th power!! That’s for only 8! And ALL 300 were literally fulfilled! Just thought you might like to go figure on that one for a while! IT WOULD BE VERY WISE FOR US TO TAKE LITERALLY THE PROPHECIES OF HIS SECOND COMING, DON’T YOU THINK????
A very interesting and legitimate question arises here. If you are a Gentile and you are “left behind” at the rapture, can you be saved during this time or have you completely lost your chance? I will not be dogmatic here. Many learned scholars have differing views on this question. I personally believe that God purposefully left the answer to this question somewhat obscure for a reason. (I will leave you to figure out what that reasoning may be on your own.) I will say only this.....IF you are left behind:
1. There is at least a possibility that your heart will be hardened so that you will believe the lies of the Antichrist. (Please read II Thes. 2:11,12)
2. There is an enormously strong possibility that you will be killed by war, famine, natural disasters (worldwide earthquakes, asteroid or meteor showers, enormous hailstones), plagues, etc.(Rev. 6:8,12-17; 8:8-12)
3. Should you miraculously survive these things, you will be required to take the “mark of the beast” on your hand or forehead in order to buy or sell ANYTHING! (Rev. 13:16,17) Those who take the mark MAY be able to survive the 7 yrs., but will lose the opportunity forever to be a part of God’s eternal kingdom on this wonderfully and newly created earth. Those who refuse the mark in favor of belief in Jesus Christ, the true Messiah, will likely die of starvation or at the hands of the Antichrist as a martyr, yet will enter into Christ eternal kingdom at Tribulation’s end. (Rev. 14:9-11; 16:2; 19:20; 20:4)
PLEASE trust me on this! You DO NOT want to wait until you experience this time to make your decision as to whether or not to hang all your faith on the ONE whose first coming was for the purpose of redeeming you from this evil world system; to take your personal sin onto Himself, kill and bury it; to provide the one and ONLY means of escape.
If you have not done so, please fall on your knees today and cry out with all your heart, “God! Have mercy on me, a sinner! Save me! I repent of my unbelief. I place all my trust in You alone for eternal life.”
Keep your eyes on the sky, my beloved friends! He could split the skies at any moment!

Part 2.....concerning current world events is coming. But DON’T WAIT FOR IT BEFORE YOU PLACE YOUR LIFE AND ETERNITY IN HIS CARE! Please, please...If you hear His voice today, do not harden your hearts to it. (Heb. 4:7)
His Word is trustworthy. He IS coming again! We may be looking eternity in the face sooner than we think!
Stayed tuned for part two! All my love and prayers for you all!
Bonnie Isbell 

The Last Time I Heard My Mother's Sweet Voice

The Last Time I heard my Mother's sweet voice

April 15, 2014 at 10:54am

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Crazy!! A whole year has passed since I heard my Morher's sweet, sweet voice.

It was April 14, 2013.
Mama had been admiring a big faced watch that I wore, so I had gone and bought her one just like mine. I had picked up a few other things to take to her and headed over to Wills Creek Village where she lived out her twilight years.
When I went in her room that day, she was sitting on her sofa circling words like she so often did. Circling words.... Circling words.... It had become her favorite past time...and it always sent a stab of pain through my heart. My Mama was SITTING for hours at a time with nothing to do but circle words!
If you knew my Mama, this was not her! If ever there was a "Martha" personality, busy, busy, ever so busy, it was her!
When I walked in her room, she immediately smiled that huge, happy smile, put down her "circle the words" book, and stood up to hug me. I held her and held her. When she began to pull away that day, I couldn't let her go. I felt like I wanted to just hold on to her forever, so I held on, holding my precious mother for a long time. Then I held her face in my hands, looked in her smiling eyes and asked her if she knew how much I loved her. Oh, she knew and I knew...as well as we COULD know. But do you really know how very much you treasure a soul until they are gone and you CAN'T look in their eyes and hold them and tell them again???
We sat and visited for a while and laughed and talked....I don't remember about what. I put some things I'd brought her away and then sat down on her couch with her, pulled out the new watch, put it on her, and showed her how to close the clasp. When you have little to do but circle words all day, a little thing like sporting a pretty, new watch is exciting stuff and I knew she'd be getting some extra moments of joy running around showing off her new "pretty."
I told Mama that I wouldn't be back for a few days because I was giving a big 60th birthday party for my friend on the 16th and I'd be busy getting things ready for that. She was always happy when she knew that I was entertaining. It seemed to give her pleasure to know that I was doing something for others. Even at 54 years old, my heart was blessed to know that I somehow gave my Mama reasons to be proud of me.
I hugged her again, kissed her sweet face, told her I'd be back in a few days, to call if she needed me, that I loved her...
I walked down the hallway...and something (which I now know was the all-knowing Spirit of God living inside me) began to overwhelm my heart with a desire to tell her I loved her again. Silly...you just told her...I'm feeling it so strongly though...Why not?? So I turned my sassy tail around and went back. I opened her door, peeked inside, and said, "I just love you so much, my Mommy!"
With a look and a smile that could never be erased from my memory, she so happily replied, "And I love YOU so much!"

And that was the last time...the last chance..the last look..the last words.

I miss my Mother!! I won't ever, ever stop missing her!

But you know what? There is a God who lives inside me and who lived inside my mother who knew things that I didn't know. That same God who prompted me to go back that day IS God and He has promised me that my weeping will only last for the night and that a shout of joy will come in the morning!

I can never be grateful enough for the prompting of the Spirit of my God that day...for desiring to leave me with that last memory, those last words...

I'll see you in just a few days...I'll see you in the morning, my Mommy!! I think maybe it won't be long....

And Just Like That, She Was Gone

April 16, 2013: The last day that Mama would take a breath of earthly air on her own.

Lord, It seems to me as if we live just a few minutes….We make our mark for good or ill….we mark off the years and the days one by one…and then….. there just aren't any more.

Just…..STOP. THE END. LAST DAY. THAT'S ALL.

 Incredibly sobering!!!!

I can't describe in words the feeling I get when I look at this precious calendar, my Lord. I don't like it much…the abrupt "STOP".  NO MORE…...

 It feels like there ought to be a story after the last mark, Lord. Something that kind of explains the abrupt END! Something that eases us out….

But there IS a story…many stories, in fact that You wrote on my heart after that last "X"; stories that tender my heart; stories that make me all the more certain that my Mother's God, whom she introduced me to, IS God!

Death seems so cruel however it comes….

For me, A phone call…

"Your mother is sick. She's not responding well. I've called an ambulance……."

A Doctor:

"Your mother has a very large bleed."

"I need to know NOW if you want her intubated."

WAIT, WAIT, WAIT, WAIT!! I WASN'T READY FOR THIS! WHAT??? A SWORD ENTERED MY SOUL.

I said to Blake, "I can't do this." And immediately, I thought of a gift that had been given to me just hours earlier that very day which said, "I Can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." WOW! Talk about a word in due season!! I knew at that moment why I had been given that gift.

Looking back, I remember so vividly when Mama nearly burned her apartment down after forgetting that she had something on the stove and going to bed. It was no accident that someone came visiting that night!

She'd cared for Calvin so faithfully up to his death and when she herself saw that she was becoming forgetful, we had asked You about it.

And on the back, she'd blotted her lips and left this prayer in her Bible.

And You answered her, my Lord! It was nothing short of a miracle that Mama was able to live out her days at WCV.

I remember sitting with Jim McIntire at the VA office and the LOOOOOOOOONG list of documentation he needed in order to receive the spousal benefits to live there. Documentation of the last corespondence Calvin had with the VA, Marriage certificates, Calvin's death certificate; Calvin's x-wife's death certificate, and on and on and on…………..

At this point, Mama would NEVER remember where any of these things were, IF indeed she even had them.

But wait…..

Jim seems to remember that Calvin has a file that Mama had helped him put together several years earlier.

And what do you know??? It was ALLLLLL RIGHT THERE!!! Mama had worked on getting some VA assistance for Calvin years earlier and it had been to no avail for him.

But YOU knew, my Lord, that in fact, You were even then,  providing for MAMA'S care in her twilight years.

 Why does that not surprise me??? For doesYour Word not say, "I will go ahead of you and prepare the way…" Mama thought she was working on something for Calvin. You were working on something for HER.

And so, to remind Mama always of our prayers and that she was where the Lord had placed her, I put one of Mama's favorite pictures of me looking up to heaven in a frame inscribed with this verse:

"See, I am sending an angel ahead of you to guard you along the way and to bring you to the place I have prepared." Ex. 23:20

For us, it was a reminder for those days when she became discontented, as old folks in this kind of place do at times, of how You, Oh Lord had gone before her and prepared this beautiful place for her to live out her days. And I told her I wanted her to remember when she looked at it how we had prayed and that I would continue to pray for her.

But this time, You were going ahead of ME and preparing me for the day when You would come for Mama and take her to THE ultimate place that You had prepared for her; for after her move to heaven, I was told that she had been found with this picture in her possession.

"Had she reached for something when she was falling and knocked it off the wall, causing it to be underneath her body?"

"No ma'am," answered the paramedic. "It was IN HER POSSESSION."

"Please don't tell me something to make me feel better. I really want to know exactly where it was and how you think it got there."

"Ma'am, it was IN HER POSSESSION. My partner read it when he put it aside while I was working on her. We all felt inspired by it…so much so that we came back afterwards and told our supervisor about it. Ma'am, she was holding it."

Because of the way that my mother was laying when she was found, as if she had been gently laid on the floor; because of the way her knees were bent with her shins propped against the closet door, as if she had first fallen to her knees; because of the picture she was holding in her hand when she was found, I cannot help but wonder…Did she walk out of the bathroom to find YOU standing there waiting to take her home? Did the angel of the Lord hand her the picture?

I don't know exactly how it happened.

But for now, I know this…

It was NO ACCIDENT that my Mama was able to live out her days at WCV. It was NO ACCIDENT that I received the gift that I received that day; It was NO ACCIDENT that my Mama was holding THAT picture with THAT Scripture on it.

"You who have been borne by Me from birth
And have been carried by Me from the womb;
Even to your old age, I shall be the same,
And even to your graying years I shall bear you!
I have done it, and I shall carry you;
And I shall bear you, and I shall deliver you." Is. 46:3b,4

Peter's Journey of Love

Peter's Journey of Love

You warned me, You told me, You knew what I would do.

My mind was confused, afraid, and even angry with You too.

After all, You're GOD, aren't You? I thought we'd nailed that one thing down.

But here You are..You don't look like God,

Being led to trial all bound!

I stepped in there and tried to help You out,

I mean, I didn't want to look like a fool!

I wanted to show them, I knew You were God,

I wanted You to prove that You rule!!

I just don't get You, I can't understand,

Speak up, for crying out loud!

You're embarrassing me and I don't want to admit

I even know You in front of this crowd.

They're pressing in on me

And You're not doing a thing,

Now it's both our necks on the line.

My head is spinning...... I hear a rooster crow....

And I've denied You now the third time.

Then my whole world fell apart in that moment

When I turned and looked up at You

Could You not have looked at me with anger or hurt

Or given an "evil eye"?

Instead, that look of deep kindness and love

Stabbed my heart and I wanted to die.

I ran from that place and cried like a child,

I can never face You again!

In a whirlwind of moments, I'd lost my God

And denied my very best friend.

The next few days were more than I could bear,

I felt like I was put through a sieve.

Every horrible emotion imaginable to man

Swept through me and there was no reprieve.

I'd been with You day after day for so long,

Where was I to go from here?

My heart cannot deny that I love You still,

Though with my lips I denied You out of fear.

I should have gone with You straight to that cross

And said, "If He dies, you take me first!"

But no! I let You go to death all alone,

I consider myself accursed!

Oh, Mary, Mary......Mary, say that again!

I'm not sure I heard you well!

His body is no longer in the tomb?

And who did the angel say to tell?

Surely, Mary, He didn't mention my name!

Oh, John! Come with me, we must find out!

So we ran to the tomb and I stepped inside

No body there, but still I had doubt.

And then, blessed Sovereign, You appeared to me

And later to the rest of the twelve.

And You opened our minds so we could finally understand

The plan You had executed so well.

It all began to make such sense

Why You had appeared so weak

Why You opened not Your mouth, Why they nailed You to a cross

Oh blessed Savior, You had taken on our defeat!

You didn't come into the world to manhandle humankind

Nor to judge the human race

But to give Your life as a ransom for them

And reveal Your willingness to take our place.

So that all through the ages

To all who believe

And are willing for their lives to be rearranged

You will take on their curses, their weakness, and their pain

And give them Your "perfection" in exchange!

Oh glorious, glorious mystery!

How can such things be?

And how can it be, sweet Jesus

That You desired to use even me?

Yet You told me that day

Before You went away

"Peter, won't you feed My sheep?"

And You gave to ME the keys to open the door

Of all Christendom to all who believe.

Oh blessed Rock of all ages,

How blessed indeed I have been

That You should make ME a picture for the world

Of my Rock, my Savior, my friend!

You asked me once if I loved You

with a love that would not fail.

I could not say so then

Because my weakness I knew so well.

Ask me once more now, my Sovereign

And I'll answer you now, not with pride

Oh yes, yes I love You Lord Jesus

And I spread out my arms and died.

Resurrection Day!

Master, As I sit at your feet this morning, I am broken. One of the greatest blessings you ever gave to my life just slipped through my fingers, and no matter how I want it back, it is gone. I feel such a hole in my heart, a vacancy with a sign over it, "Unable to be filled." I cannot relive what was. The years, the days, the moments left me with memories but the substance lies buried beneath the soil. I MISS HIM!!!! I drove down the drive yesterday and the pasture was empty and I ached. I cried but my tears did not cause him to reappear. My heart is broken for David. I didn't know how having the responsibility for burying Rocky would affect him. I sat with Rocky in his stall until David had dug out the place where he would be buried underneath the most beautiful oak in the pasture. Then he made me leave. I was thinking so much about Rocky that I forgot to think about David. But he spilled his heart to me last night and I ached for him, although, to be honest, I would still not have wanted anyone else to do the job and neither would he. He said, "Sometimes it's just very hard to do a man's job." While I was thanking God so much that He gave me a man child who was capable of such things, I guess I forgot that this man child also has a heart! David said that though he has buried other horses before, this was just not in any way the same. He can hardly remember life when Rocky was not there. He wanted to show the utmost respect for Rocky and it just felt so wrong to lay his body in a grave. He said it took him forever to adjust Rocky's 1000 lb. body to a postion where he looked comfortable. It felt so wrong to cover him with dirt. It wrenched his precious heart. He knew it was just a shell now, but it was the body he had loved for so long, and it just hurt! He said his thought was, "Someday, this will be me!" There is just nothing right about death. Romans 8 comforts me. "Against it's will, all creation was subjected to God's curse. But with eager hope, the creation looks forward to the day when it will join God's children in the glorious freedom from death and decay..." God's creation and God's children.... And so....the entire created world is in bondage to death and decay and that is the reality of life. But, thanks be to God, who became accursed for us, took on death, and conquered it!!!! Thanks be to God for Resurrection Day! Thanks be to God that all Your creation will someday be released from the curse of death and will join God's children in resurrection to eternal life!! Thanks be to God that, because He lives, all His creation will live again! Dat's what da Bible say! Uh huh!!! (I'm smiling now!!!) :-) "Weeping may last for the night, but a shout of JOY comes in the morning!!!" Ps. 30:5

To Rocky, With Love

It was love at first sight for me. And maybe it's just because I want to believe it, but I think it might have been the same for you as well. I know it sounds strange, but I think God made us for each other. My friend, Farley, had told me about you. Ray Ramage owned you then, but, being the huge-hearted man that he is, he recognized your incredible worth and knew that someone needed to have you who would have more time to ride you and care for you. It was on that day when Farley took me to the Everett's farm where you lived, that one of the most beautiful love stories began between a girl and her beloved horse. I remember Farley leaping up on your back from behind without so much as a piece of twine around your neck, riding you all over that pasture, guiding you with your mane! You never flinched. I'd never seen anything like you in my life! You were beautiful, Rocky! You were huge, a bay quarterhorse with a slick and shiny coat....and CUT!! You were young and yet, even at that time, you had the demeanor of an old and mellowed man. Ray told me to keep you for a few months and try you out. If it worked, fine. If not, he would not be disappointed. He loved you. So...we boarded you at a friend's farm and went to see you, ride you, and feed you every day. You were the most amazing horse that ever lived. From day one, every single one of us had no fear of you whatsoever. You never had a mean bone in your body. I don't know if you ever figured this out or not, Rocky, but other horses don't act like you. Some things spook other horses and they react; but not you! Other horses act like ANIMALS, for gosh sakes; but not you! It was as if you were just a heart, surrounded by gorgeous horse flesh! After knowing you for 25 years, I know without a doubt that this is exactly what you were. I don't think you particularly liked being on that farm, although you never really let on. You were one of SO MANY, and they were ANIMALS! They fought and kicked one another and so you just did your sweet best to just lay low and stay out of their way. (Although, you were certainly capable of holding your own when put to the test!) I have to laugh now about the whole thing when I think how close I could have come to missing out on one of the greatest blessings of my life. Ray wanted $1000.00 for you, and Cynthia, being the most wonderfully frugal woman I know, told me not to give $1000.00 for that horse! "He's not worth it", she said!! And You weren't worth that, Rocky! Not at all! Not even close! If only the truth had been fully known, Ray would have asked for my soul! That might have come somewhere close to how valuable you were. Not quite, but somewhere in the neighborhood. No price tag can be put on what you have meant to me, Rocky! Then came the day when Blake told me that I could have one of two things; living room furniture for our new house or a home for you. That was EASY! And so, we built you this home. We built it for you, Rocky! A bazillion horses have shared this pasture with you, but this barn was built for you and it will always be yours! And so it was thatin some of these surrounding woods, on some of these roads and trails, that you, my friend saw me through some of the roughest seasons of my life. I don't mean to be sacriligious, but Rocky, in many ways, on many days, you were my salvation. You were a balm for every wound. When I was sad, or confused, or depressed, I came to you. And you rode me away. And somehow, when I was on your back with the wind on my face and blowing through my hair, my spirit felt as if it were lifted from my body, and it soared to a higher place where joy engulfed me. I can't describe it, but I think you knew. It almost seemed that we were one in our spirits and that your spirit was also being lifted to somewhere in the stratosphere as you cut loose and ran like the wind. I'm not sure if the world is a safe enough place anymore to explore the places that you and I went, but the point is; I was never afraid when I was with you. NEVER! Although we always had many other horses to come and go, none have ever been to us what you were. Of course, you knew that. Rocky, sometimes when people are extraordinarily good people, they are taken advantage of. Horses too, I suppose. No matter which of the other horses were getting a saddle thrown on their back and a bit put in their mouth, you were NEVER left out!! We could put a baby or a toddler or an old man or woman on you with never a fear! Or we could put an experienced rider on you for the ride of their lives. It's no wonder that every time you saw us coming, you high-tailed it! You rascal!!! I know you got tired of being the one to do all the giving. It's just that you were the best, Rocky! You were the most dependable. But surely you knew that you were also the most valued! Then the days turned to years and the years began to tell on you. The farrier says that we should probably stop riding you because of your arthritis. Ah ha! Getting old is not all bad, huh? And so, you lived out your days grazing and gracing our pasture with your incredible beauty. Today, you left us, Rocky. It was time; GOD'S time. You had lived for far longer than other horses do! And you were tired. I sensed it. But when you saw me this morning, though you were too tired to even lift your head from the ground, I honestly believe you really wanted to get up and eat! That's my boy!!!! I never saw a horse get more pleasure over meal time! I loved that about you! Pain will pierce all of our hearts every time we open that barn door and don't hear you holler. In every aspect, today was a day of miracles. I have always prayed that I would be with you when you breathed your last breath. In all the years past, every time you were sick, you wanted to put your head in my belly and press against me. You need my nearness. I could not bear the thought of not being there to hold you close to me when you left this world. And though I often stayed with you for hours on end, I could not live at the barn. So, miracle # 1. was that the angels took you 20 or 30 minutes after I walked into your stall this morning. And you went with your head close to my chest. Dr. Whetstone had told us this morning that we could give you some shots of B12 and steroids and possibly buy you a little more time. OR...he could do the other unthinkable option. I knew in my spirit that your life was depleted and that you were just too tired!!! When I reached the stall this morning, you were laying down, utterly unable to lift your head, though you tried so hard! Sweet, sweet Devin was with me and I thank the Lord so much, not only for Devin's emotional support, but because no one would believe the rest of the story unless I had a witness. You didn't seem to be suffering. You were just too tired to breathe and you were becoming restless as your breathing became harder and harder. I asked Devin what I should do and he said it wasn't his call, but that I needed to make a choice now! I told him to go ahead and call Dr. Whetstone, but the moment the words came from my mouth, I knew I could not do it! And so, right there, as I held your precious head to my breast, I prayed out loud over you. "God, If you have ever heard a single prayer I have prayed, please hear this one! PLEASE don't make me make this decision. This is your call, God, not mine! I believe that animals go to heaven and that Rocky will be the horse that I will ride back to this earth on. But right now, I need some confirmation. If what I have believed is true, then please send your angels for him and take him home now." The next part flys over my head, and if it were not for Devin confirming to me that he heard the same thing, I would chalk it up to my imagination. You spoke in a way that I have never heard your voice, sweet Rocky. Three distinct syllables...which uncannily sounded like, "I.....LOVE......YOU." Devin heard the same thing, and he is certainly not one to get sensational! At that moment, my dear Rocky, my soul was so knit to yours that it hardly seemed unusual. I told you that I knew that you loved me and that I loved you so much!!! I told you that I was going to be okay and that you should let go now. Then I saw the white of your beautiful eyes, you breathed a few more short breaths and the angels took you, just as I had prayed. Oddly enough, Devin and I found ourselves rejoicing! I could speak nothing but "Thank you, Jesus", over and over! Devin said he felt like he'd been to church! My tears will doubtless flow often. They will flow for many reasons; because I'm struggling to believe you're gone and I can hardly conceive of life without you, because I'm missing you; because I am aching to hear your hearty holler, because I am longing for the scent that is unique to you; (I am never going to wash the gloves I was wearing this morning!) but I think that I will weep mostly trying to grasp the grace and mercy that was shown to me when God gave the best horse He ever made to me! I have loved you with an everlasting love, Rocky. Thank you for loving me back. Thank you for giving me most of the years of your life. Thank you for being my therapist! Thank you for being a delight to my children and to the rest of the world that has known you. THANK YOU, OUR DEAR, DEAR ROCKY! Forever and ever! Your Mama "Then God said to Adam, 'Behold, I have given you....every living thing that moves on the face of the earth which has a living soul..." Gen. 1:30 "And I saw heaven opened; and behold a white horse, and He who sat upon it is called 'Faithful' and 'True'....."KING OF KING'S AND LORD OF LORD'S"... And the armies which are in heaven were following Him on white horses....." Rev. 19:11,14 And Bonnie's horse shall be called, "Rocky." AMEN!